Saturday, December 13, 2008
Hypocritical retard
I realize, more and more, that I can't stand not knowing how people feel while I can't stand to let people know how I feel. And that makes me a horrible person.If I could, I would retreat so far back into fiction and prose and worlds where only one conflict exists per plot sequence -where the third person POV makes everything crystal clear, from intention to action. I'd bury my entire being into page after page of "reality" if I could. I would.
If I stay away, I won't ever have to make mistakes like that ever again..and no one'll have reason to be hurt or disappointed or proven right or wrong..no one, including me. And I won't ever have to be a horrible person.
If I keep quiet, I won't ever have to say all the wrong things that I always think are right..at the time. Time always proves me wrong. It always proves that I am a horrible person. Well, in that sense, time always proves me right.
If I don't let people in, then no one'll have the chance to realize, first hand, that I am a horrible person, ever again.
I think I'm a horrible person. Save yourselves.
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